Groan. I wish I did have time to be a better journalist. I'm trying to decide whether to keep this blog here or switch it to LiveJournal, which could be really convenient especially in keeping track of friends' posts. I'm kind of vain and like to make the blog pretty, which with LJ is harder to do. Maybe I'll post to both a few times and see how I like it? I could drive anyone who checks both pages insane, but since that probably amounts to two persons, (*waves*) I may take the risk.
I think of a lot of great things to say here and then poof! they are gone. Usually these brainstorms come in the car, an excellent thinking spot. Sometimes it's while changing a diaper or while doing dishes. Those thoughts are more likely to get caught. I've thought about getting a cheapy voice recorder, or even an add on thingy for my iPod, (I can't believe mine is almost 2 years old, LOL!) but I'm worried about looking like a total geek loser in traffic. Or like my former avatar.
Sometimes, even when am ready to post, I try to log on and Blogger is fritzing. That's a point in LJ's favor. I still like Blogger better. Oh, well.
Side note,
when is Twin Peaks Season 2 going to come out on DVD?!
Lately I've been caught up in an outburst of
lactivism stirred up by the ABC talk show, The View. (link is nobody I know, but an amusing debate) I would have gone to the nurse-in protest in New York City, I didn't hear about a Boston event, or I would have been there. You can't help but flash a little bit when you're nursing a nearly 2 year old! Ha ha.
I used to watch the View frequently, but Teletubbies has crowded them out of my TV schedule. It's just as well. I am miffed by the hosts' belittling of breastfeeding mothers and with their antiquated attitudes toward nursing in public. The guests they have on lately aren't helping. Oh yes, I know, I am fortunate to live in a state where gay people can get married and where I can nurse even a squirmy toddler in pretty much any location we find ourselves; Middle America is not that way yet, blah blah. It does irritate me when the media in general decides that it is a judge of parenting practices. Dr. Phil, Nanny 911, etc. I suppose there's no way around that. (Don't even get me started on formula advertising. Do you think that if breastfeeding had more mass market products attached to it, TV hosts would suddenly be more sanguine about it?)
OK, rant over, for now. And change stations.
I recently realized that how I feel about breastfeeding, other mothers may feel about drug-free pregnancies and births. As most of my readers know, I have chronic, mild high blood pressure and also had gestational diabetes with Charlotte. A very poor candidate for midwife care or for a birth center, which was my original ideal. In labor, I was monitored within an inch of both our lives. Internal, external, IV, etc., etc. At 7 cm, I opted (OK, hollered!) for an epidural, and I'm happy with how things turned out. That doesn't mean that I don't want to try for less interventions next time. There's a limit to what I can do with my medical conditions. With the way my OB and specialists were talking early on, I was extremely lucky to have gone full term with the giant and gorgeous child I have. There's nothing to be sad about for me, but I can hope for an even better experience on the next go round.
Sometimes, hearing people expound on natural birth makes me feel small and jealous, and angry at their pulpit thumping. It was a rude awakening for me to realize that a lot of other moms probably groan when I start in on nursing. I know a lot of fabulous moms who don't breastfeed, and many more who tried everything to make it work, but it just didn't. I know how wounded and regretful they can feel about it. I know that throughout history there have almost always been substitutes for mother's milk available, that they were necessary; whether they were any good or not is a debate for another place and time. BUT that doesn't stop us from hoping that we can reach our goal and that nursing will be the accepted, normal course of baby care, that nobody has to get "hormonally militant" about, because it's just the way it is.
Idealist soapbox has now been closed for the evening. Please deposit 25 cents and a new "cents" key for my keyboard.
Charlotte is doing great. She's added so many words as I detailed on the
front page of her web site. Tonight, I shared an ice cream with her, and she was saying "Mmmmmm..... I-cream...... (s)poon......" (Never try to share an ice cream with that kid unless you give her a spoon! She'll never give yours back! ;) )
From the annals of Ironic Baby Journal, Charlotte has been sleeping a lot better since Daddy went on this business trip. Perhaps partly coincidence (3 out of 4 eyeteeth are in - ouchies) and partly not wanting to squeeze every moment out of the day when Daddy is home. Chris is the world's greatest dad but who could resist riling the baby up near bedtime if you haven't seen her all day? ;)
We have had a hard time getting her accustomed to her bed (full size mattress on the floor) as her sleeping place. It's finally working. When she's tired she crawls onto the bed, grabs a Care Bear and says "Ni-night." She stays still for 3-4 minutes and then sprints away at top speed. Oy. It normally takes me at least an hour and a half to get her settled. But today, bless her heart, she skipped her afternoon nap and I was able to plop her in bed at 7:00. Ha ha!! She woke up at 8 for a nurse, all disoriented, ("I fell asleep... in car?") but she is back in peaceful dreamland once more. I've been keeping a journal of sorts for her bedtime routine, so I at least know what I've tried. It's going to be funny reading someday. Maybe tomorrow, I will transcribe a few pages for you all. You may laugh.
I still haven't seen Episode III yet. Grr. I kind of just want to get it over with. I liked the other prequels OK but wasn't blown away by them. I'm prepared to like this one on the same scale, but I still believe I will need major Kleenex to get through the ending. I've only been rehearsing it in my mind since I was, what, eight!?
On Monday, my mother's group is going to see The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants movie. I'll give a review in a future post. We read the book as our bimonthly (?) book club selection and mostly we loved it. (Reading it gave me the distinct sense that as much as I might like to write the Great American YA Novel, I'll have to make it all up from scratch, because my own memories would
not sell any books!) We figured Monday night would be a great time to actually get a table at the Italian restaurant next to the theater, too. They are both in the mall, so no need to move cars after Mamas have had a chianti or two! It has been a blessing to get to know so many mama friends. :)
It's even better to get the hell out of the house after what will have been a nearly 10 day span as a de facto single parent. I know, I know, I knew about the travel requirements in advance, I know the job pays enough so I can make the choice to stay home........ we're not getting ahead, but we're not slipping too terribly behind, either. We've been doing this for Charlotte's entire life, so I ought to be used to it by now. For the most part, I am. It's tiring not to even be able to pee by myself, or run down to the store just to listlessly browse through the shampoo in peace and quiet. Again I will sing the praises of the DVD player, foe and friend you are by turns. Charlotte is now over Buzz and Woody's movies for the most part. (!!) Adores the toys, but they watch Thomas with her. The theme music for Thomas may eventually make me leap off the balcony, but it's a good enough show. Fiendishly expensive tie-ins. Oh well, we can play with them at friends' houses. And Barnes and Noble, I didn't realize until this week that they had a full Thomas Brio set for anyone to play with.
Farewell for now. Charlotte has been moved to the Mama bed for the night, and I can't be on the computer anymore. Time for that gloriously bad show "Hit Me Baby 1 More Time." Perversely, I've been looking forward to it all week!
Lots of
New Pictures of Girlina Lou
